Monday, August 06, 2007

True confessions of the Heart and Jedi Slayers



I sat there next to my Master Phobia, in the healers. I hated being there, I really did. Too many memories of big needles and pain in this place. Yeah you got that right I am afraid of shots! Being here didnt help. So I sat here next to Master Godfrey clutching his hand every now and again. I didnt want Master Windu or Master Cin to notice I was scared. I looked up and saw Master Skywalker on the Holoscreen. He looked like he was tired. Poor Master Skywalker I thought to myself. I stared at his flickering image for what seemed like forever. I felt a slight tremmor in the room, it was my Master waking up.


"Master, are you alright?" I asked.


All she did was mumble and I could not make out anything she was saying. I sat there and looked up at Master Godfrey. He looked down at me and smiled softly. I listened to what Master Windu and Master Cin was saying and thought to myself, 'A Jedi Slayer? Great, now we have a crazed lunatic possibly within our midst... Just swell, Lovely, really Lovely...'


The part that got to me was Master Cin was trying to accuse my Master of doing this or having something to do with this. How dare he! Master Godfrey must have picked up on what I was feeling and tugged sharply at my sleve and sternly looked at me as if to say 'Do it Belda, and you'll be doing some extra work for the next few months!'


I saw that look and backed down quickly. I have to admit I was not happy Master Cin had out rightly accused my Master. I looked at Master Godfrey and then back at my Master then at the floor. Master Godfrey was right, it isnt my place to challange Master Cin. It is the place of the Force itself to do so. I began to feel ashamed of even feeling this way. I mean after all it was Master Cin who came to my rescue when that Phantom Sith first came into my room and scared the dark side outa all of us girls. So I took a deep breath and looked back at the floor.


I looked up after I had inwardly corrected my heart and saw Master Cinn looking at me. He smiled and said to me...


"Belda, little Belda... I did not mean to cause you offence, trust me. But Your Master was the last one seen with Jedi Samantha Harris, we must look at everyone as a suspect. Though If I remember correctly, Jedi Harris was never nice to your Master. I know your Master would not strike anyone down, she was always one of my best pupils. Would you know of who it might have been?"


I had a blank surprised stare on my face. He spoke to me, and it wasn't in a harsh fashion neither... wow... I looked at my Master then Master Cin, I thought about what he said and shook my head no. To be honest this was very much a mystery. I looked at Master Windu. Sometimes I could sense like he could if he wanted to stare right through you. This I found to be most uncomfotable at best anoying.
Master Cin nodded in responce to my answer. He looked over at Master Windu and both decided to leave. I looked up and realized that my Master was speaking with Master Skywalker. I truelly adored Him. I thought the Sun litterly rose and set on Him. *sigh*
I then decided it was best that my Master needed some rest so I exited and went down the hall. I couldn't help notice something was definately different about my Master. She seemed different. And what was the talk of Mara and Tai, who are they? No record of them being at the Temple... I knew better than to question my Master, but I felt she was the only one who could answer me. I sometimes felt alone and left out. Why am I feeling like this? I knew where I stood amongst my peers. There is no real reason to question my Masters doings, is there?
I continued to walk down the halls and to my room. I felt alone, truelly alone. I did the best I could to shake the feeling of lonelyness off of me and go to bed. I couldnt sleep, all I could do was cry. So I layed there crying softly into my pillows. No one would know, and I doubt anyone would even care. I cried myself to sleep.
TBC...
I wanted to thank everyone for stopping by and taking the time out of your busy lives to read my blog stories.